Numerologically, I am in a year 7, which, according to my Wise Old Rosicrucian Friend is a 'transitional' year. Barely 2 weeks in (if you follow the Chinese calendar as I do) it sure is shaping up that way.
My Aboriginal Art program has been canned because nobody has enrolled - yet. I have tried to explain about 'Noongar time' and that my students won't even think about the course until the week it starts, which is next week. Yesterday, with my boss on the phone panicking about numbers, accountants and auditors breathing down her neck, I made the snap decision to shut it down. I have warned my students on many, many occasions that if they don't 'play the game' with me we all end up without what we want. My next question to my boss - 'what are my options?' I knew exactly what she was going to say: 'well there's still the prison. The guy who was taking the job has changed his mind'. I wonder why. No, I don't actually.
I went out to the prison several times last year to do some assessing because the lecturer had been escorted abruptly from the premises. I can't go into details but it didn't take me too long to figure out what the dynamics were. This is a job, and I need a job, but I think of it as a poisoned chalice. It is probably going to be almost impossible to situate myself comfortably between the inmates and the guards. Even though I have very strong humanitarian values, any hint that I am on the 'side' of the prisoners will be seen as a betrayal - this is difficult politics.
I think I might be able to manage it, but I will have to watch my back from both parties, for different reasons. My colleagues have said to me that I can handle it, that I am tough. I'm not really that tough at all. I liked a lot of the guys out there, I am under no illusions - it is a maximum security prison. In some ways I would prefer not to know why they are there, however the guards do kindly let some things slip and I am not grateful for the knowledge. The inmates are as keen as mustard, their lives are very restricted and they are hungry for life, creative pursuits. My view of them is no different to the free population: if they can find some meaningful way to express themselves creatively, all the better for them and everyone else.
The environment is like another I used to work in - the 1900 psychiatric hospital on the hill, the one with the huge locked doors and equally large bunches of keys - its occupants making animal sounds, so profoundly retarded and disfigured they would not be allowed to be born today. I left that job because I was on the side of the inmates, the staff thought me disloyal and without support, it was just too difficult.
The paradox hasn't escaped me though. After having been so far down into the darkness last year, the Unconscious and all its psychological ramifications, I have been reaching for the light. Now my ability to face more of the darkness, that of humanity itself, will be thoroughly tested.
8 comments:
Joan said:
Thank you for your thoughts on taking on the prison teaching. I am glad you are going into it fully aware of possible pitfalls. I went in quite naively and fell into some traps. I will share the experience with you sometime.
Whoa that is huge. Well I know you won't fall for the art teacher phenomenon. A shame about the tafe stuff. That sounded like good work.
Well I will be teaching art out there but I hope I don't fall for the usual stuff. And yes, Ab. Art was good. Getting some good results.
Yes that will definitely be a challenging position...shame about the other role but the boundaries have to be drawn.
Yes, as you would know! I think there has to be an end to the systems that have sustained a lot of Aboriginal people for decades. Otherwise they just keep on circulating through and never break the cycle of dependence. But I felt sometimes that we were working slowly toward some independence. Or maybe I was kidding myself.
A good wishes for your new endeavour, Michelle.
Thanks Barb. I keep telling myself I am lucky to have a good job, even though it is by no means secure in the long term. I am sure there are aspects of it I will enjoy a lot.
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